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Shaking...
BAF
Member #2,981
December 2002
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Quote:

Consider a dictator robbing your country blind and enslaving it's citizens; arresting, imprisoning, and torturing anyone who questions him. Would thinking of him make you upset?

Probably not. But then again, I don't let my like or dislike for people run my life. I don't go off into depression because somebody talks about somebody I don't like, I just ignore it and move on.

Personally, it takes a LOT to get me upset. I just don't let stuff bother me, most of the time it's not even worth my time. Life goes on, so why waste it?

Neil Black
Member #7,867
October 2006
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Quote:

Consider a dictator robbing your country blind and enslaving it's citizens; arresting, imprisoning, and torturing anyone who questions him. Would thinking of him make you upset?

That's why we have the second amendment ;)

Rampage
Member #3,035
December 2002
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Quote:

Consider a dictator robbing your country blind and enslaving it's citizens; arresting, imprisoning, and torturing anyone who questions him. Would thinking of him make you upset?

Did she do all that to you? Wow, now I understand. You two were into S&M...

-R

Thomas Fjellstrom
Member #476
June 2000
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Inphernic: If there was ever an occasion where I appreciated one of your posts, it'd be that one :-*

--
Thomas Fjellstrom - [website] - [email] - [Allegro Wiki] - [Allegro TODO]
"If you can't think of a better solution, don't try to make a better solution." -- weapon_S
"The less evidence we have for what we believe is certain, the more violently we defend beliefs against those who don't agree" -- https://twitter.com/neiltyson/status/592870205409353730

LennyLen
Member #5,313
December 2004
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Quote:

That's incredibly ignorant. Think about it for a minute.

Perhaps you should. It obviously went over your head. Yes, people get upset over things all the time, and for various reasons. This still isn't a good thing.

Quote:

Consider a dictator robbing your country blind and enslaving it's citizens; arresting, imprisoning, and torturing anyone who questions him. Would thinking of him make you upset?

It probably would, but again, there are far better emotional responces that could be generated, such as resolve to do something about said dictator.

Quote:

I bet if you said that to a psychologist [s]he would offer you a seat and start asking questions about your childhood

Ah no, that would be if the psychologist discovered your feelings for this girl.

OICW
Member #4,069
November 2003
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Quote:

Ah no, that would be if the psychologist discovered your feelings for this girl.

Which brought me to last advice I'm going to give, if he's actually reading them, go to a doctor*.

*psychologist, of course.

[My website][CppReference][Pixelate][Allegators worldwide][Who's online]
"Final Fantasy XIV, I feel that anything I could say will be repeating myself, so I'm just gonna express my feelings with a strangled noise from the back of my throat. Graaarghhhh..." - Yahtzee
"Uhm... this is a.cc. Did you honestly think this thread WOULDN'T be derailed and ruined?" - BAF
"You can discuss it, you can dislike it, you can disagree with it, but that's all what you can do with it"

bamccaig
Member #7,536
July 2006
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LennyLen said:

Perhaps you should. It obviously went over your head. Yes, people get upset over things all the time, and for various reasons. This still isn't a good thing.

It's not unhealthy to feel upset. It's unhealthy to pretend you're not.

LennyLen said:

It probably would, but again, there are far better emotional responces that could be generated, such as resolve to do something about said dictator.

If you weren't upset about the dictator you would have nothing to resolve.

Thomas Fjellstrom
Member #476
June 2000
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Quote:

It's unhealthy to pretend you're not.

Sure, but being obsessed is also unhealthy.

--
Thomas Fjellstrom - [website] - [email] - [Allegro Wiki] - [Allegro TODO]
"If you can't think of a better solution, don't try to make a better solution." -- weapon_S
"The less evidence we have for what we believe is certain, the more violently we defend beliefs against those who don't agree" -- https://twitter.com/neiltyson/status/592870205409353730

Neil Black
Member #7,867
October 2006
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Yeah, see a therapist at least. You need to talk to a professional to make sure you don't have some hidden things in your mind, like violent urges that will be misdirected towards someone else.

LennyLen
Member #5,313
December 2004
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Quote:

It's not unhealthy to feel upset.

Which is why I never said it was. There may be valid reasons why people get upset, but they're still not good reasons.

bamccaig
Member #7,536
July 2006
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LennyLen said:

Which is why I never said it was. There may be valid reasons why people get upset, but they're still not good reasons.

A good reason and a valid reason are the same thing where I come from... ::) In fact, "good" and "valid" are synonyms. Care to expand on your nonsense? ;D

wearetheborg
Queen of the Universe
June 2003

I'm not sure if anyone has suggested this yet, but you need some professional counseling. I honestly do mean this in the nicest possible way.

A lot of people here see you as "emo", but I think the problem is much deeper than that. You need to start dealing with your issues, and I don't think that you helping yourself is enough... I mean you listen to depressing music, you can't get a hold of yourself when you are in situations that remind you of her, and you keep trying to justify your behaviour. You are unable to help yourself at this point, and you need to realize that.

__________________
You!!... Off my planet!!

OICW
Member #4,069
November 2003
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Diana: you're third person to actually suggest that, if I didn't forget about somebody. Still no response from him to the last few posts except searching if "good" and "valid" are synonyms. Other than that, there are people who can get out of that state, but there's a point of no return (self return) and he's crossed it and don't have the guts to admit it.

I hear what you're saying, the answer is NO! Those two are not synonyms.

[My website][CppReference][Pixelate][Allegators worldwide][Who's online]
"Final Fantasy XIV, I feel that anything I could say will be repeating myself, so I'm just gonna express my feelings with a strangled noise from the back of my throat. Graaarghhhh..." - Yahtzee
"Uhm... this is a.cc. Did you honestly think this thread WOULDN'T be derailed and ruined?" - BAF
"You can discuss it, you can dislike it, you can disagree with it, but that's all what you can do with it"

bamccaig
Member #7,536
July 2006
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wearetheborg said:

I'm not sure if anyone has suggested this yet, but you need some professional counseling. I honestly do mean this in the nicest possible way.

I could recommend that to half of A.cc. In fact, everybody can benefit from professional counseling. Unfortunately, professional counseling comes at a cost.

For the record, it has been suggested and I have considered it in the past, but I'm not to a point where I need it like some of you think.
[quote ]A lot of people here see you as "emo", but I think the problem is much deeper than that. You need to start dealing with your issues, and I don't think that you helping yourself is enough... I mean you listen to depressing music, you can't get a hold of yourself when you are in situations that remind you of her, and you keep trying to justify your behaviour.
</quote>
What do you mean by "you can't get a hold of yourself..."? Obviously I do get a hold of myself or I wouldn't function.

I wonder if psychologists ever diagnose "emo"... ???::) You're not children, grow up.

james_lohr
Member #1,947
February 2002

Quote:

It's not unhealthy to feel upset. It's unhealthy to pretend you're not.

Nonsense. You can wallow in your emotions or put mind over matter and move on. Pretending you're not upset may be a very good way to help yourself get over something. I'm not saying that you lie to yourself about your situation, I'm saying you put your chin up, compose yourself and keep going - concern yourself with the people around you and not yourself.

Quote:

If you weren't upset about the dictator you would have nothing to resolve.

You are confusing emotions with morals and beliefs. Being upset is emotional instability. In your case I'm sure it's driven by introspection and is therefore unhealthy.

Ask yourself why it upsets you to think about her. Was everything you did with her so unpleasant? Or is it a feeling of loss - the desire for something you'll never have? Either way you're the one generating your response. From an objective standpoint you could quite easily dwell on the positive memories and hope that she finds someone who is able to make her happy (which clearly isn't you!). Perhaps the first question you need to ask yourself is your motivation for begining this thread in the first place. You clearly had no intention to take anyone seriously, so what was it? - you just enjoy the attention?

Richard Phipps
Member #1,632
November 2001
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And.. here's Johnny!
{"name":"The-Shining-Here-comes-Johnny.jpg","src":"\/\/djungxnpq2nug.cloudfront.net\/image\/cache\/8\/c\/8c8066df0f03558d1bb88e24e122897d.jpg","w":311,"h":450,"tn":"\/\/djungxnpq2nug.cloudfront.net\/image\/cache\/8\/c\/8c8066df0f03558d1bb88e24e122897d"}The-Shining-Here-comes-Johnny.jpg

OICW
Member #4,069
November 2003
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Quote:

I could recommend that to half of A.cc.

Can you be more specific? Don't worry, point fingers, we did.

Anyway all of this is futile, he's not taking us seriously. On a sidenote - if number of people tell you something, think about it, there may be some truth in it. ;)

[My website][CppReference][Pixelate][Allegators worldwide][Who's online]
"Final Fantasy XIV, I feel that anything I could say will be repeating myself, so I'm just gonna express my feelings with a strangled noise from the back of my throat. Graaarghhhh..." - Yahtzee
"Uhm... this is a.cc. Did you honestly think this thread WOULDN'T be derailed and ruined?" - BAF
"You can discuss it, you can dislike it, you can disagree with it, but that's all what you can do with it"

Onewing
Member #6,152
August 2005
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Quote:

Don't worry, point fingers, we did.

I'd point fingers, but apparently, I bit them all off. Huh, fancy that. I had to use allegro 5.0 just to post this...

------------
Solo-Games.org | My Tech Blog: The Digital Helm

bamccaig
Member #7,536
July 2006
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OICW said:

Anyway all of this is futile, he's not taking us seriously.

I'm not taking you seriously because you're not taking me seriously.

OICW said:

On a sidenote - if number of people tell you something, think about it, there may be some truth in it. ;)

Why would I take the opinions of people that have never met me over my own beliefs? ::)

Onewing
Member #6,152
August 2005
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Quote:

Why would I take the opinions of people that have never met me over my own beliefs?

Not to mention we are only digital infarctions of your mind (which is even more evidence you need to see a shrink pronto, being that you believe in digital fairies, you nutso).

------------
Solo-Games.org | My Tech Blog: The Digital Helm

LennyLen
Member #5,313
December 2004
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Quote:

A good reason and a valid reason are the same thing where I come from... In fact, "good" and "valid" are synonyms. Care to expand on your nonsense?

Good as in beneficial. Care to explain how getting upset can be considered good in that sense?

edit:

Quote:

Why would I take the opinions of people that have never met me over my own beliefs?

That sounds strikingly like the "You're all wrong and I'm just misunderstood" response you hear from clinically depressed people.

wearetheborg
Queen of the Universe
June 2003

bamccaig said:

I could recommend that to half of A.cc. In fact, everybody can benefit from professional counseling.

No... Half of a.cc members are just socially inept, not mentally imbalanced. You are dealing with obsession, and you also need to learn some coping skills for life's tough situations (because clearly, listening to depressing music isn't much of a remedy).

Quote:

What do you mean by "you can't get a hold of yourself..."? Obviously I do get a hold of myself or I wouldn't function.

Look at the title of this thread. You were SHAKING! The interesting part is that you didn't even see her... You saw her sister for god's sake. That is not a normal or healthy reaction. What's even more interesting is that you never even dated her. Like many high school friendships, this one dissolved, however you are unable to accept that. You are so obsessed with this girl (even though you never dated!) that you now view all women as evil. Yes, you are obsessed.

Quote:

You're not children, grow up.

Please take your own advice. It would help you and your friends/family.

__________________
You!!... Off my planet!!

OICW
Member #4,069
November 2003
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Quote:

I'm not taking you seriously because you're not taking me seriously.

Well some of us try to, me for example. But I'm thinking about putting an end to my effort and start being cynical and sarcastic as Inphy.

Quote:

Why would I take the opinions of people that have never met me over my own beliefs?

Then ask yourself a question why, for god's sake, are you asking here on this forum?. I'll give you small hint - this is exatcly why are people making fun of you and why people didn't make fun of Miran, when he asked.

EDIT:

Quote:

That sounds strikingly like the "You're all wrong and I'm just misunderstood" response you hear from clinically depressed people.

Yep, sounds like that.

Quote:

You're not children, grow up.

Funny to hear that...

[My website][CppReference][Pixelate][Allegators worldwide][Who's online]
"Final Fantasy XIV, I feel that anything I could say will be repeating myself, so I'm just gonna express my feelings with a strangled noise from the back of my throat. Graaarghhhh..." - Yahtzee
"Uhm... this is a.cc. Did you honestly think this thread WOULDN'T be derailed and ruined?" - BAF
"You can discuss it, you can dislike it, you can disagree with it, but that's all what you can do with it"

bamccaig
Member #7,536
July 2006
avatar

LennyLen said:

Good as in beneficial. Care to explain how getting upset can be considered good in that sense?

I'm sure if you talked to a medical professional you would get a much better explanation. In any case, getting upset is a natural and uncontrollable response. I haven't considered exactly why before, nor have I studied it, but obviously there is benefit or we wouldn't do it.

For example, when somebody you care about dies you need to deal with it. Regardless of how it can always be described as getting upset. Some people cry, some people lash out, some people build a mansion out of glass bottles, etc., etc. That's a natural response, and it can all be considered "getting upset." It's a necessary response, and though some ways of dealing with it are better than others, you're still upset regardless of how you handle it.

wearetheborg said:

Half of a.cc members are just socially inept, not mentally imbalanced.

I assume you're implying then that I am mentally imbalanced. A qualified psychologist would never consider diagnosing a mental imbalance from a Web forum so what makes you superior? What are you basing your conclusion on?

wearetheborg said:

You were SHAKING!

Yeah, if you haven't noticed shaking is a common reaction to many emotions. Excitement, fear, anger, sadness. Shaking isn't enough to diagnose a mental imbalance.

wearetheborg said:

The interesting part is that you didn't even see her... You saw her sister for god's sake. That is not a normal or healthy reaction.

It's not natural or healthy to get excited or nervous when you see somebody you know for the first time in months? ::) Perhaps you missed the part that I was just as close to Jen's sister as I was to Jen.

LennyLen
Member #5,313
December 2004
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Quote:

I'm sure if you talked to a medical professional you would get a much better explanation.

I spent many years talking to a psychiatric specialist about the subject actually.



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