And this time it's serious.

For all those who didn't follow the first thread here's a short recap: I have a female friend who has for something like eight years been in love with a guy who lives halfway across the country. She didn't know what she really wanted and tried different things (which I didn't understand and therefore started the original thread) but eventually she got together with the guy. That's the point where the original thread got closed down.

So last friday they got together, he came over to her place and of all things to do they got drunk. So much in fact that she supposedly doesn't remember what happened that night or if anything happened at all. She's almost certain something did happen and now she thinks she's pregnant (for reasons I will not go into, but she says she is in fact quite sure about it).

So what does she do? She calls me of course! She's crying and sobbing and asking me what she's going to do and how can this happen to her and things like that. And I'm sitting there paralyzed. I can't understand half of the things she's saying and what I can understand makes me open my mouth in total shock.

All I could say to her was some generic stuff about how it's too early to be sure, how she should wait a few days, take a pregnancy test and then talk to the guy about it. I had no idea what to say to her. I wanted to help but I didn't know how.

I mean, what do you say to a girl in a situation like this? That's my question for you this week. I think I'm going to bed now and I expect serious answers in the morning. Thank you.

Hm, I thought that my problems with the other gender were serious, or even really bad. Oh how I was mistaken.

So first of all, she should take a test - that one you pee at. Oh and more than one, second the other day and maybe third on the day after the other day. That way she could be sure whether she is or not pregnant. I suppose that her feeling is based only upon not feeling good the other morning. That could be due to pregnancy, but if you say, she had been drunk, I'd say it was hangover.

Even if she finds out she's pregnant, it's not the end. She has still time for abortion. Oh I forgot, she's pregnant with the guy she loved for eight years, so where's the problem?

Let me say this first: the girl you like tells you about her having sex with another guy? Now that hurts. Sorry, man.

What is she worried about the most? Does she fear her parents will hate her? Does she fear the coming nine months or the birth? Does she fear the guy will leave her alone with the baby? You must know this already, so try to get her relaxed by focusing first on what she actually fears. She will need a cool head to handle whatever happens next. She must take a test, of course, and wait for the results, there's no point on worrying before she knows for sure. If she's not pregnant, be happy and tell her to have safe sex next time. If she is pregnant, the remaining steps will depend on what her family and the guy say.

I'd like to rant about the stupidity of unsafe and drunk sex, but I'm sure other allegators will take care of that.

Ranting does no good unless she also reads the forums.

Sounds like you already told her everything. There's nothing you could say at the time that would have done any good. She probably was trying to bait you into calling her a rotten person so that she could justify her own self pity.

relay01: I think that though he likes her, it's not like he'd have strong desire to be with her, or even fallen in love. If he's rational/semi-rational he knows there's no chance of getting her. Unless he has the same problem as me - my mind knows it's hopeless, but my heart "thinks" otherwise.

So I think that this on best-friend-only basis. He wants to help her somehow.

At least its not you who got her pregnant. You should be celebrating...

Stop asking for it on this forum. Best advice you'll get.

This woman needs some girl friends she can go cry and eat chocolate ice cream with. How in the world could you, a guy, possibly relate to her situation? Sympathize, but tell her to go deal with it or talk to someone else. Nothing more you can do that you haven't already done.

EXACTLY! Listen to this man, he speaks the truth.

Jeez Miran. First this and now this. Looks like you are having a very dramatic week.

It looks like the advice I would have given has already been given by 23.

As for why she would reach out to Miran for advice on this: Perhaps she was feeling panicked and thought of Miran as a friend who lives relatively close by who is both wise and caring thus a good candidate as someone to get advice from.

edit:
Dammit, Phipps beat me to the eye!

There are those for up to 3 days, actually...

Most of those (if not all) are not reliable enough to immediately detect pregnancy, you have to wait until the date where she supposedly has her period.

The only reliable test that early is via blood sample.

Make tons of threads about her and print them out and show them to her.

I thought I got a girl pregnant one time, that sucked. It wasn't the first time I'd had sex, but almost. I was like 'WTF!?!?' And I've been scarred ever since. At least now we have the 'morning after pill'. But there is no morning after pill for 1) herpes, 2) gonorhea 3) syphyllis 4) or aids. You're stuck with those babies. So to sum up: keep it in your pants and don't be a cuddle biatch.