Ah hell... I know it's allegro.cc, but what the hell...

I normally don't have trouble finding girls to go out with... But I've recently discovered I may be attracting the wrong kind of girl... I've been the funny ass hole and that has worked, but I tried being the 'nice guy' to get the type of girl I was looking for and WTF... She didn't bite! Are all women programmed to go for that over confident funny guy ass hole type or is there something I'm missing? I uh... I don't understand women, but I'll go with being the ass if that works, but what other techniques work... Any comments on this?

Try being yourself.

Seriously. I know it sounds corny (as it has been thoroughly overused) but you'll get the best match for yourself by just being you.

Not all, and definitely not for the over-confident type. But most women are more attracted to men who do exhibit confidence in themseves.

Being a 'nice guy' and being self-confident aren't mutually exclusive, but some guys seem to think being the nice guy means they have to act in a subservient manner, and this definitely isn't the case.

I'm an ass hole... Being myself doesn't work to get the type of girl I'm looking for.

[edit]

That's a good point... Being the subservient 'wuss' is definitely not the answer... Maybe I tried so hard to be the nice guy it backfired... I spend too much time thinking this crap over...

This is true.

This is also true.

I'll add that if you find the right match, it doesn't actually matter that much what you do (as long as it's not insane), things tend to just work out on their own.

I've had plenty of those...

Hmmm... Something like a fairy tale? Like ride up on a white horse and save the princess? I don't believe in fairy tales... But yeah if you meet the right girl then things just work. I get that... I guess if keeping a relationship together seems like work then it isn't really working is it? Where is the epiphany emoticon?

The nice guy routine is not a winner. It turns out it's not actually that nice.

I would say if you really want a girl just be a guy about it. Be obvious, don't play games and don't be shy. Look out for numero uno first.

edit: and obviously its not always going to work because there's no rule saying the girl has to like you.

I think I've found 'the one' when all I have to do is say... "Bah weep granah weep nini bong!"

Girls think they're princesses but if you treat them as such you'll get nowhere.

Ron, you basically got it right. Most girls go for the cocky funny guy as a fairly hard and fast rule, and being "nice" gets you in the friend zone quickly and permanently. That's pretty much how it is, sadly. I've been doing the nice guy thing (as is my nature) for a while now and every date ends the same. It sucks, but such is the game.

Keep being the asshole. It works, as you've already seen.

-

Some time ago a friend of mine with his girlfriend were out and were debating over number of things. I was one of their topics, the girl said that I'm such a nice and polite guy so some girl's gonna snatch me (sooner or later).

A friend of mine once told me that she doesn't understand her kin, why didn't some already caught me. Reasons were the same.

I agree with Evert and Darizel (plus others) that being yourself is the best way. I for one can't imagine that I'd act as a bad guy or an asshole as you put it. It's not in my nature, I can't behave like that. Well at least I don't like the idea, I would have problems with my conscience.

Edit:
That being said doens't mean that you should not be sure in your pants and a bit brassy when trying to date a girl. (hope I didn't use wrong words)

Yeah, here's a shocker: women are people. You also are a person. The rules on which broad, general personality types are attracted to which other broad, general personality types are both (i) not gender dependent; and (ii) so general as to be meaningless. If you think you've spotted any rules that can be completely specified in one sentence then you're falling foul of the human mind's usual desperate willingness to grossly distort the available (and anecdotal) evidence to support an existing conclusion without bothering to alert you consciously that it is doing so. That you can say something like "pretty girls always go out with alpha males" and have other people say "that's so true" is no more statistically valid than if you went back in time 100 years and said "black people are inherently less intelligent" such that a bunch of other people said "that's so true". This obviously isn't a detestable injustice as racism is and was, but the point is that if you seed a social or cultural idea with a group of people then they end up finding sufficient evidence to believe it and subsequently repeating it as fact.

My advice: put zero thought whatsoever into this area of thought. Treat both men and women as people, and things will probably work out.

Doesn't really hurt to improve your odds though to go along with something that has "sufficient evidence".

In my opinion, happiness and confidence are the two factors you need to have to attract the kind of people you want to stay with.

Women like real men; they like men who know how to listen and when to shut up, confidence in their abilities, men with failures in their past, and honesty.

In short, women like men who behave realistically and don't put on airs or pretend they have life figured out or have no troubles.

All of you have valid points and I'm sure the debate could go on forever... What works is gold, but the problem isn't necessarily getting the girl. It's getting the 'right' girl... But I've realized this, you'll never know until it happens. If it feels like work trying to stay together then somebody is doing something wrong. And in that case, if it can't be corrected, it's time to leave the pieces on the floor and move on. If things just work then you've found something more valuable then gold! At least that's what I have come to believe... But I'll do just about anything to get my foot in the door which is why I call myself the ass... It at least lets me get to know her better (like find out if she's married! JERK). I don't like being the ass which is why I think things don't really work out, but if you don't like me for who I am then !#$% off... No regrets though.

Which brings me to another song...

To all the girls I've loved before
That traveled in and out my door
...

Yes I know... I hate that song too. But maybe it would work as a punk rock song

Yup. the problem is never picking up the girl but actually finding one. A lot of times i'll try one that i don't really like because she's hot and it could be fun but right now I'm quite focused on this one girl that I know will last and so I'm actually ignoring other "offers" and "chances" until i get a yes or no from this girl.

Try some pickup lines, my favorite is: "Hey does this smell like ether to you?"

edit:

On a serious note: I see a lot of conflicting advice here, and I would venture that some people giving one type of advice here might be getting sexed a lot more than people giving another type of advice, so it might be in the OP's best interest when you give advice, to state how much game you do or don't have (and how often?). Just sayin'.

Also, the thought that women are people too, is just not practical here. I think we need advice from piccolo.

If being yourself attracts the wrong type, maybe you should change who you are.

I used to have very long hair. All the girls I dated were freaks. I shaved it and have never looked back.

Note to self: grow hair longer.

Well, back when I was young and dumb enough to have competitions with flatmates about who could bring home the most girls, I managed 28 in just under six months. I did this by getting half-drunk and acting like an asshole, which goes to prove that this method does work.

However, I wouldn't want to share my life with any of them. In the 15 years since (and two or three years before), there's been approximately half a dozen, and they've been the ones that have mattered to me. Those were the women I got through generally being myself (I say generally, in that if I was to be entirely myself I wouldn't talk to any women since I have a phobia about it).

OP: You are not ready for a serious relationship. It's as simple as that.

super attractive girls like guys who are jerks, because the majority of guys they attract are superficial, as is also, usually, the girl. it also adds drama to their life, without which they wouldn't be able to use facebook or tweeter. furthermore, this combination of "beauty and the jerk" creates the "hedgehog-dilemma-spring-oscillation" relationship that supplements their growing emotional problems. the world has come to admire and even envy such relationships through numerous publications found in your neighborhood grocery checkout stands and other assorted media.

This behaviour has been going on for hundreds of years before social networking sites existed.

The what?

p.s. If you can type quote marks, your SHIFT key obviously works, so how about using it at the start of each sentence?

Well you see... Again that's the problem... I am looking for a serious relationship, just not finding that girl. But I guess the general idea is just be myself and hope that comes along right? Maybe if I stop thinking about it or even stop looking, it will surprise me.

I think... he was making fun of me

Of course that picture is old...

[edit] fixed picture...

What does a picture of a clown with his hair on fire have to do with anything?

edit: someone attempted to ninja his post!

That's usually the best idea, I think.

Then it's settled then... I'll stop looking...

[edit] Sorry LennyLen. For some reason myspace decided to jump to the next picture... Myspace is lame anyway...

I'd say that's none of your business, but I will say that it depends on whether you're looking for a serious relationship (in which case, be yourself) or a quick shag (in which case, anything goes).

I agree Evert... Too personal... Not what I was looking for anyway, but I'm gonna sleep now... Thanks everyone.

To some extend girls are like birds, if you go chasing them they'll just fly away.
If you pretend not to be interested however they will get curious and try to get your atention

Funny you mention birds...

I usually rate a relationship by comparing it to a moment that can only be described as pure awesomeness... I was walking home from a now ex girlfriends house feeling so awesome that two bluebirds literally flew down from a tree and landed on me... One on my shoulder and the other on my head. YES IT REALLY HAPPENED... Sorry to be dramatic, but that feeling of pure awesomeness coupled with the bluebird on my shoulder connected a memory that will never fade... The birds were obviously being fed by someone in the neighborhood and were not afraid of people, but it just put an exclamation point on the end of a good day. I may never come to have that level of awesomeness again, but that doesn't matter. You won't see me dancing around like Mary Poppins. I just felt like sharing that...

"My bellybutton grows fuzz. Does yours?"

maybe Gaia wanted to tell you something

I've found that the phrase "My bellybutton would like to get to know your bellybutton" piques their interest, usually with a quick giggle and smile.

A friend of mine would say that you're naive and dumb. On the other hand I would compare him to LennyLen back in those days he brought 28 girls in 6 months. So go figure.

Oh man! Ask them if they can touch their elbows together behind their back, that's the best conversation starter for a cute busty girl that I can think of.

Dude... Your face must be bright red from being slapped all the time... But yeah I've done that before. It's kind of a turn off though when they actually do it though. It just makes them seem unintelligent. Unless there trying to be cute

//(.)Y(.)\\

STOP SPOILERING!! OMG sheesh!

Error 404: Appropriate smiley not found. Aborting post...

I know ASCII art isn't that revealing, but I thought a spoiler might be appropriate given that a.cc is a classy site...

but what the hell...

    ,,,
   `O_o\
//(.)Y(.)\\

Why?! Why did I do that? It's either a robot or a lesbian... I can't tell.

It's a long eared shaggy dog holding his breath.

No no... I see it now... It's a lesbian robot with a mullet hair cut and a drooping eye. ...................................... And really big boobs.

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Lesbian robots are hawt... I can't wait 'til they exist for reals, then I can just buy a couple and not have to worry about wimin issues. Plus they'll be smarter than any human anyway, which will make for lots of creepy, yet interesting conversations...

On a related note, a co-worker was telling me that as androids look more and more like people, they'll be creepier and creepier, cause the human mind, if it sees something that looks bi-pedal but not anything like a human that's fine, but the closer it gets to looking human, yet wrongly, the more creepier it automatically looks (imagine a walking, talking mannequin). Whatever, as long as it never gets over emotional and starts chucking cars at my head.

What researches have found is similar, they call it "The Uncanny Valley", where anything thats close, but isn't quite close enough to "normal" will creep people out.

Cyborg Lesbian pirates can ruin your day!

Can?!?!?

What research? The concept of the uncanny valley is pseudoscientific. There have been no studies done on this, no scientific assays. It'd help if people would stop repeating this nonsense and actually try to quantify this. The examples people give ("FF: The Spirits Within" comes to mind) are far from universal. I will go ahead and say the uncanny valley does not exist, and it is a modern urban legend.

Really? I've heard about actual studies, but I'm not going to bother searching for them.

Good point, SiegeLord. But have you ever seen a "life like" robot? They're creepy! So dismissing it as "legend" is perhaps too strong: "Rumour" is good.
Thomas, I know it's tempting but stay away from cyborg lesbian pirates. They don't have to ruin your day. (BTW I thought you would have more trouble with Undead Lesbian Vikings where you live.)

Yeah, that!

FAIL... edit: aparently I failed... I googled this and it has a definition, my bad. edit #2: nope, not my fail, assay is something to do with metal study results, which is unrelated... So SiegeLord fails.

Also, creepy is highly subjective anyway, so any study done, scientific or not, would only render the results of the people who gave subjective repies... or am I missing something?

Well, if you'd rather they not sit around downloading mp3s all day, you can just set pirate mode to off in the settings.ini file. Also turning automatic updates off (in same file) will really come in handy when the robot apocalypse comes...

Like many words, assay has more than one meaning depending on context. Its most common meaning is to examine or analyze, which fits perfectly well with SiegeLord's usage.

He still fails, though. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uncanny_Valley

Is correlation considered scientific these days? A sufficiently high number of samples should be enough to counter-effect the results of subjectivity.

Yeah, someone who develops creepy robots would say something like that.

More like a really bad special effects department.

When I saw that robot hostess made in Japan and showcased on some exhibition I thought that it was pretty creepy. Time to read Do androids dream about electric sheep once again and rewatch Blade Runner.

Damn lesbian robots looting all the booty! They ruined the day already... And yes it is very creepy...

Oh god... What have I created?!

Which brings me to another question... If a nerd that can't get a date creates a women robot for... well... 'scientific study'... does that robot instantly become self aware and want to be a lesbian rather then continue with the nerds 'scientific study'?

See, those are what we call bugs, we'll just have to work them out before it leaves beta, plus what's all this scientific study nonsense? I'd make mine for sex, and house-hold labour (you know, now that women have rights and stuff and arn't property anymore) after all necessity is the mother of invention.

edit: but what happens when robots protest about "robot's suffrage"? crap.

You turn them off.

Oh. That explains a lot about my life.

Well, let's start one...

Personally, it creeps me out.

The people in the movie "the Polar Express", for example, are far creepier than those in, say, "The Incredibles".

Anyone who agrees, post and we'll have some statistics to back it up .

This is starting to sound more like the movie weird science... Kind of...

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it's called the "Uncanny Valley".

This is why I hate video games lately. They try so hard to look like real life that their graphical flaws drive me nuts.

Totally agree.

I've been saying the same thing since I got into computers. I'd rather play something stylized and/or cartoony than something that's trying too hard to look real.

The original 'uncanny valley' has been coined by Mori in the 70s. Since then there have been studies here and there, some confirming it, and some denying it exists. Indeed, some experiments showed that the inverse 'uncanny peak' existed (e.g. this).

There is no evidence it is a general phenomenon. In an anecdotal example, I did not find FF: The Spirits Within or the Polar Express to be uncanny in any way whatsoever. I don't have any issue with games which try (and fail) to replicate realistic facial expressions either. In my personal opinion (not substantiated by data) I think this uncanny valley is a general result of people being intolerant of outsiders. If you grew up in an environment filled with such simulacrums, you wouldn't be freaked out by it as much as someone who has never seen something like this before.

Somewhere in Asimov's "I, Robot", he states the robots have cartoonish faces because people would feel uncomfortable otherwise. In the movie, "The Black Hole", Ernest Borgnine comes to the conclusion that the robots don't have faces because that would make them too human.

Those would be the studies that you were questioning the existance of in your previous post?

While there is obviously no robust evidence to support the hypothesis, there is enough evidence to suggest that there is some sort of phenomenom going on.

For myself, I believe it is probably linked to the phenomenom that you get when you show people photos that have been doctored so that they are seeing a face that comprises of two mirror images, producing a symmetrical face, like the following:

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I once took a philosophy paper entitled "Computers, Minds, and Logic." As part of it, the professor discussed an experiment he helped conduct at Oxford. In the experiment, people were shown a series of photographs, and were asked to identify which photo was of a celebrity. All of the photos were actually of students and other everyday people, however some of the images were digitally altered so that the faces were symmetrical. The symmetrical faces were picked out approximately four times more frequently than what random chance should have allowed, considering that the images were special in no other way.

While the results showed this abnormality, the researchers weren't able to formulate a viable hypothesis as to why the phenomenon took place. Actually, Jack was quite dismissive of the manner in which they tried to prove some of their claims, but he was intrigued by the results that the experiment did produce.

I don't have any references for the study on me (my text books are boxed away in storage), but he discusses the experiment, and has footnotes with the references in his book Artificial Intelligence: A Philosophical Introduction.

I was discussing this thread with my girlfriend today and she told me another interesting fact that I didn't know. She has a cousin who works as a sub-editor for a woman's magazine, and one of the tricks they discovered years ago to bolster sales is to flip the celebrity photos for the magazine cover so that it's a mirror image. Apparantly the difference is enough for people to subtly pick up on as they glance at it, which draws them in long enough for them to start reading the headlines. I doubt they did any scientific analysis for this, but there's huge money in the woman's magazine industry, and when they decide something is worthwhile, there's probably some basis for it.

There's a reason the Incredibles didn't creep you out, they are made to look like a comic book, and not to be real.

BTW, any one notice how dark skin people look way more real than other people in those 3d movies that attempt to look real? (FF: Spirits Within had that old dude as well)

SiegeLord, in the link you posted... I found it funny how they put Michael Jackson after Moving Corpse in the creepy part of the study...

The one thing I don't understand about that curve is the zombie factor... Why are zombies considered more human like... To me they would be the least human like of them all. I mean if your a zombie then your dead and not 'lifelike' at all. And if you're trying to imitate life through AI then zombies shouldn't be included at all because zombies are fiction... Study flawed...

And industrial robots, moving stuffed animals, computer animated images aren't using any kind of AI and are totally living on their own?
After your logic the only thing on the list would be the human himself.

That's the point he was making. When 3d animations are cartoony they're not creepy, when they're life like they're creepy.

Actually I didn't find the FF movie creepy, or polar express (except for the ghost scene), or beowulf to be creepy at all... (well parts in all three I guess, but that was plot, not animation style). There were even scenes in all three of them where I was momentarily convinced it was real people, but those passed.

My point is more toward the fact that some things in that graph are incorrectly listed as being more human like then others... Something like an artificial limb is not more human than say a humanoid robot... If you factored the vertical part of the graph into determining the horizontal one then you would have the correct order of each, but the graph has too much psychology put into it and so it stays morally accurate and not scientifically accurate... I mean god forbid someone put a handicapped person in that graph and they end up lower then a puppet... Using psychology, where would you put Hitler in that graph? With the healthy people? But then where would he go scientifically? That's right with the zombies at the far left of the graph where they belong... and Micheal Jackson ended up in the negative of the vertical graph too even though he belongs elsewhere...

I'm ranting and going off...

The whole point is that it's all a damn psychological mess... Being handicapped or just being a horrible person doesn't make you less human or human like... To be human is to be flawed and knowing that is what really makes you human... If you can't understand that

Um, how the hell we got from nice and perfect non-geeky topic to this discussion, which is kinda creepy?

on allegro.cc.. yeah

It's the damn lesbian robots... They're trying to confuse us...

But I've come to realize... The one women who posted in this thread gave the best answer...

I'm not sure how to feel about that...

Just ignore her, she doesn't speak for all people, or all women.

Theres no way to know if you are ready or not, other than to just try it. And theres no way to GET ready than to practice.

This is so true. I never can get the women I want because I pretend to be a nice guy and it seems they can detect that I am not being honest. In the other hand, I treat ugly women like shit, and they are allways interested in me. And frome time to time, I get one of these, arrgg

I guess Anne Pohtamo, Miss Universe 1975, wouldn't have been picked. Take a look at her eyes. Almost extremely assymmetrical. Not that she would be ugly.
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I'm not ready for a relationship either. But you get dates in the meantime. Just enjoy what you are doing, and if you can't, don't do it. Too obvious?

Women prove the point this turn has taken. They have boobs, long hair, wear makeup, etc to make themselves look less real (manly). If you saw a mannish woman, you would be creeped out (k. d. lang?). Is it me, or do the lips in the picture LennyLen supplied look off centered?

I always thought one of Roxanne Dawson's eyes was a little higher than the other...

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Women are a myth perpetuated by the Internet.

That has to be an edited photo... They probably edited to fix up the defects in makeup or it is just a bad angle... That photo is pretty creepy anyway... I'd post one, but apparently I've lost the privilege as all of mine are just links now. I'll blame Britney Spears and Paris Hilton for that one. I guess I should have known better though...

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Woman, or man impersonating a woman?

Really?? Well... Seeing as how I'm the Queen of the Universe, I think I DO speak for all people, or at the very least for all women.

I said that you weren't ready for a serious relationship because you're not even sure of who you should be in order to attract the "right" girl. Your personalities (your partner's and yours, not your multiple personalities) create the basis for a strong, serious relationship.

You're title gives you no power outside of this site. So you're the Queen of, like, two women. Including yourself.

Sure he is. He's just complaining it's not who he wants to be, but who he wants to be doesn't work. Blame the women, not him.

Why not my other personalities...

This is correct... I don't want to be the asshole all the time... I use this method to get my foot in the door (insert other analogy here) and it works for a good while, but I'm afraid that is not attracting the type of girl I'm really attracted to... I'm simply trying to find the strategy that works to find that type of girl, but another problem is I'm not sure what type of girl that is... I guess the best course of action is to stop complaining and continue what I've been doing this past week and just be myself... and use the asshole character as a last resort...

Have a think if there are any activities you enjoy that aren't as male-dominated as programming. (For me, there's music.)

If there are, have a think about places you could do that activity with like-minded people. (For me, this is the orchestra.)

Then that's where you can go to maximise the chances of meeting the right kind of girl for you.

Out of interest, where do you currently go to meet girls?

Usually just wherever I happen to be, but I meet girls in the strangest of places... I try to take advantage of each opportunity to meet someone, but my least favorite is the internet. Probably the strangest place I've ever met someone was in a dark alley in Hollywood (as wrong as that sounds)... I'll explain... some friends and I were walking from the car to this 'other place' and I ducked down the alley... well because it was a long drive and then a car pulls in and parks behind me with a couple of girls inside and someone says... "Oh my god what is he doing?" So I say the first thing that comes to mind, "Whoa. Ladies please... I'm an undercover cop. You'll blow my cover. I'm just trying to look inconspicuous." Of course they knew the truth, but I got a laugh ('foot in door') Probably not the best example, but I always thought it was funny.

Wouldn't that be a.cc

[edit]
Queen of the Universe? How did you get such a title?

Pretty much yeah.

There was an election, and I won, fair and square.

Good ol' Democratic Technocracy. The technocrats always vote for the Borg

I really disagree on this. Its good to have this mindset to relax like its good to be religious for the warm and fuzzies. But these things are lies.

Humans have been selecting their mates through intense screening process forever. It has gotten us pretty far. We've managed to select for well rounded minds far more capable than our competing species. One of our greatest assets is the intenseness of our mating process.

If people want to believe a truism I'd be comfortable agreeing with this statement: Your ancestors and parents successfully found mates, so chances are you will too.

Were you just dissing religion?!

Arg... This isn't the thread for that discussion...

I think his point was

With sperm and egg donation, this may not be true for much longer. Soon we'll have people running around that are incredibly sub-par as mates. Then what?

Ooh, I see a good opportunity for a race of minions to do my bidding... Hmm, should I de-evolve humans or evolve chimps? Decisions, decisions...

Oh great... Neil Black has his master plan. Idiocracy here we come...

Another eight years of George H.W. Bush? I thought we had term limits on the office of president.

Stop! You'll give me nightmares.

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Hey, what's wrong with that? I eat a little p***y now and then myself.

It's not all bad. The first thing my army of minions will do is work to produce food, thus feeding the world's population.

Then, when I have enough minions that aren't farming, they will begin producing cheap, quality products that I will sell at cost.

And then, they build the FTL drive. I'll need a lot of minions for this, because I'm depending on the "infinite monkey/infinite time/Hamlet" theory.

Do you work for Wall-Mart?

Hmm... If only Einstein had thought of that one...

No. The key word in my sentence was "quality".

Oh so its the whole "infinite monkey/infinite time/Hamlet" theory again... I get it...

For those who don't know what I'm talking about, the theory goes that an infinite amount of monkeys, poking keys randomly on an infinite amount of typewriters, given an infinite amount of time, would eventually produce the full, perfect text of Hamlet.

They'd also produce the entire content of my personal journal (read: diary) and I find that rather annoying!

And one version of Hamlet where every occurance of the name of the prince was spelled Omelet.

Someone said quite a true sentence in the beginning of this topic. In my practice too women are like wild animals who flee when you show your interest but who curiously come very close and try to approach when you don't care about their presence. That's so funny how true it is because it is a strange paradox. However, it throws an exception when it comes to players who know the game. It seems that female AI has some exploits but their assembly lines are so damn hard to understand that it takes a lot of practice to become successful cracker

[[Insert joke about installing my hardware]]

They want you to chase them, but they also want you to expend some effort. Otherwise, they'd be seen as "easy", trampy, etc.

The human egg won't let a sperm cell inside until it has a large selection of sperm knocking on the door so to speak. It "wants" to pick and choose the best one (what determines the best one is still an area of research)

Isn't chasing them a perfect example of expending some effort?

I think they want you to prove that you're a happy person and can survive without them, so that you'll still be happy when you've been together a long time and (possibly) take each other for granted. That's why they get turned off if you show excessive interest.

Guys do the same thing - it just happens somewhat less often

Anyone see the movie Good Luck Chuck? I saw it last night... Good times. Where is Jessica Alba when you need her. Penguins...

The more common one I think says that they will produce "The complete works of Shakespeare".

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In the Duck world the males rape the females they like. Also the females chase around the male they prefer (till one day they get raped).

Females adapted by forming multiple vaginas. One vagina leads to the eggs and one leads nowhere. If the female approves of the male who is raping her, she opens the correct vagina. If she doesn't, show opens the one that leads nowhere.

Oooh, excellent band name: "Vagina to Nowhere"

"Hmm. Something doesn't smell right."

He's in a vagina to nowhere

That all sounds like some sci-fi porn to me.

Duckstin, do you have a link to back that up? It sounds awesome if it's true Who needs contraception, eh?

hi everybody

Its definitely true. They interviewed the scientist who discovered it on one of my podcasts (I think it was WNYC). As I understand, it is a pretty recent discovery.

On the podcast they also mentioned spiral vaginas that the females could squeeze, preventing the sperm from getting in. ^[1]

Yeah... Spiral... This thread has once again become creepy...

I wish I had spiral fake anus to block gay rapings.

It's something that happens to you that often?

Dolphins also practice rape. Female cats on the other hand prefer it rough.

I read in Scientific American that certain grooves in the ocean floor were explained by bull blue whales ganging up on blue whale cows to force them to the bottom to be "raped". The cats I've voyeur-ed on prefer the "thorough yet gentle" treatment.

Nine out of ten actually enjoy gang rape.

Why rape when you can just pay for it?

This thread is moving in the wrong direction... Anal rape I think is a different thread... And I don't think anal sex can get you pregnant so you're in the clear.

If you're good enough with the one-on-one you don't need extra people...

And why pay for it when you can get it for free

So, monkeys that share their meat with females...

I'm sure I saw on a BEEB documentary not so long ago that male chimps aren't even bothered whether it's male or female they have sex with.

All right... This thread has now taken a creepy turn...

How do you explain the missing fur on the back of the female's neck, then?

I've seen the tom get rough, but the female is quite vocal in her displeasure

Edited for accuracy. Let me know when the html tags work.

The tag for strikethrough does work, it's just documented incorrectly on the help page. There have been two threads about this already.