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Women...
Ron Novy
Member #6,982
March 2006
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Ah hell... I know it's allegro.cc, but what the hell...

I normally don't have trouble finding girls to go out with... But I've recently discovered I may be attracting the wrong kind of girl... I've been the funny ass hole and that has worked, but I tried being the 'nice guy' to get the type of girl I was looking for and WTF... She didn't bite! Are all women programmed to go for that over confident funny guy ass hole type or is there something I'm missing? I uh... I don't understand women, but I'll go with being the ass if that works, but what other techniques work... Any comments on this?

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Oh... Bieber! I thought everyone was chanting Beaver... Now it doesn't make any sense at all. :-/

Darizel
Member #10,585
January 2009
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Try being yourself.

Seriously. I know it sounds corny (as it has been thoroughly overused) but you'll get the best match for yourself by just being you.

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LennyLen
Member #5,313
December 2004
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Ron Novy said:

Are all women programmed to go for that over confident funny guy ass hole type or is there something I'm missing?

Not all, and definitely not for the over-confident type. But most women are more attracted to men who do exhibit confidence in themseves.

Being a 'nice guy' and being self-confident aren't mutually exclusive, but some guys seem to think being the nice guy means they have to act in a subservient manner, and this definitely isn't the case.

Ron Novy
Member #6,982
March 2006
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Darizel said:

Try being yourself.

I'm an ass hole... Being myself doesn't work to get the type of girl I'm looking for.

[edit]

LennyLen said:

Being a 'nice guy' and being self-confident aren't mutually exclusive, but some guys seem to think being the nice guy means they have to act in a subservient manner, and this definitely isn't the case.

That's a good point... Being the subservient 'wuss' is definitely not the answer... Maybe I tried so hard to be the nice guy it backfired... I spend too much time thinking this crap over...

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Oh... Bieber! I thought everyone was chanting Beaver... Now it doesn't make any sense at all. :-/

Evert
Member #794
November 2000
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Darizel said:

I know it sounds corny (as it has been thoroughly overused) but you'll get the best match for yourself by just being you.

This is true.

LennyLen said:

Being a 'nice guy' and being self-confident aren't mutually exclusive, but some guys seem to think being the nice guy means they have to act in a subservient manner, and this definitely isn't the case.

This is also true.

I'll add that if you find the right match, it doesn't actually matter that much what you do (as long as it's not insane), things tend to just work out on their own.

Ron Novy
Member #6,982
March 2006
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Evert said:

(as long as it's not insane)

I've had plenty of those...

Quote:

things tend to just work out on their own.

Hmmm... Something like a fairy tale? Like ride up on a white horse and save the princess? I don't believe in fairy tales... But yeah if you meet the right girl then things just work. I get that... I guess if keeping a relationship together seems like work then it isn't really working is it? Where is the epiphany emoticon? :D

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Oh... Bieber! I thought everyone was chanting Beaver... Now it doesn't make any sense at all. :-/

Goalie Ca
Member #2,579
July 2002
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The nice guy routine is not a winner. It turns out it's not actually that nice.

I would say if you really want a girl just be a guy about it. Be obvious, don't play games and don't be shy. Look out for numero uno first.

edit: and obviously its not always going to work because there's no rule saying the girl has to like you.

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Ron Novy
Member #6,982
March 2006
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I think I've found 'the one' when all I have to do is say... "Bah weep granah weep nini bong!" ;D

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Oh... Bieber! I thought everyone was chanting Beaver... Now it doesn't make any sense at all. :-/

Mark Oates
Member #1,146
March 2001
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Girls think they're princesses but if you treat them as such you'll get nowhere.

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23yrold3yrold
Member #1,134
March 2001
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Ron, you basically got it right. Most girls go for the cocky funny guy as a fairly hard and fast rule, and being "nice" gets you in the friend zone quickly and permanently. That's pretty much how it is, sadly. I've been doing the nice guy thing (as is my nature) for a while now and every date ends the same. It sucks, but such is the game.

Keep being the asshole. It works, as you've already seen.

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Archon
Member #4,195
January 2004
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-

OICW
Member #4,069
November 2003
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Ron Novy said:

Are all women programmed to go for that over confident funny guy ass hole type or is there something I'm missing? I uh... I don't understand women, but I'll go with being the ass if that works, but what other techniques work... Any comments on this?

Some time ago a friend of mine with his girlfriend were out and were debating over number of things. I was one of their topics, the girl said that I'm such a nice and polite guy so some girl's gonna snatch me (sooner or later).

A friend of mine once told me that she doesn't understand her kin, why didn't some already caught me. Reasons were the same.

I agree with Evert and Darizel (plus others) that being yourself is the best way. I for one can't imagine that I'd act as a bad guy or an asshole as you put it. It's not in my nature, I can't behave like that. Well at least I don't like the idea, I would have problems with my conscience.

Edit:
That being said doens't mean that you should not be sure in your pants and a bit brassy when trying to date a girl. (hope I didn't use wrong words)

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Thomas Harte
Member #33
April 2000
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Yeah, here's a shocker: women are people. You also are a person. The rules on which broad, general personality types are attracted to which other broad, general personality types are both (i) not gender dependent; and (ii) so general as to be meaningless. If you think you've spotted any rules that can be completely specified in one sentence then you're falling foul of the human mind's usual desperate willingness to grossly distort the available (and anecdotal) evidence to support an existing conclusion without bothering to alert you consciously that it is doing so. That you can say something like "pretty girls always go out with alpha males" and have other people say "that's so true" is no more statistically valid than if you went back in time 100 years and said "black people are inherently less intelligent" such that a bunch of other people said "that's so true". This obviously isn't a detestable injustice as racism is and was, but the point is that if you seed a social or cultural idea with a group of people then they end up finding sufficient evidence to believe it and subsequently repeating it as fact.

My advice: put zero thought whatsoever into this area of thought. Treat both men and women as people, and things will probably work out.

Onewing
Member #6,152
August 2005
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the point is that if you seed a social or cultural idea with a group of people then they end up finding sufficient evidence to believe it and subsequently repeating it as fact.

Doesn't really hurt to improve your odds though to go along with something that has "sufficient evidence". ;D

In my opinion, happiness and confidence are the two factors you need to have to attract the kind of people you want to stay with.

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SonShadowCat
Member #1,548
September 2001
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Women like real men; they like men who know how to listen and when to shut up, confidence in their abilities, men with failures in their past, and honesty.

In short, women like men who behave realistically and don't put on airs or pretend they have life figured out or have no troubles.

Ron Novy
Member #6,982
March 2006
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All of you have valid points and I'm sure the debate could go on forever... What works is gold, but the problem isn't necessarily getting the girl. It's getting the 'right' girl... But I've realized this, you'll never know until it happens. If it feels like work trying to stay together then somebody is doing something wrong. And in that case, if it can't be corrected, it's time to leave the pieces on the floor and move on. If things just work then you've found something more valuable then gold! At least that's what I have come to believe... But I'll do just about anything to get my foot in the door which is why I call myself the ass... It at least lets me get to know her better (like find out if she's married! JERK). I don't like being the ass which is why I think things don't really work out, but if you don't like me for who I am then !#$% off... No regrets though.

Which brings me to another song...

To all the girls I've loved before
That traveled in and out my door
...

;D

Yes I know... I hate that song too. But maybe it would work as a punk rock song :P

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Oh... Bieber! I thought everyone was chanting Beaver... Now it doesn't make any sense at all. :-/

Goalie Ca
Member #2,579
July 2002
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Yup. the problem is never picking up the girl but actually finding one. A lot of times i'll try one that i don't really like because she's hot and it could be fun but right now I'm quite focused on this one girl that I know will last and so I'm actually ignoring other "offers" and "chances" until i get a yes or no from this girl.

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Bah weep granah weep nini bong!

Michael Jensen
Member #2,870
October 2002
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Try some pickup lines, my favorite is: "Hey does this smell like ether to you?"

edit:

On a serious note: I see a lot of conflicting advice here, and I would venture that some people giving one type of advice here might be getting sexed a lot more than people giving another type of advice, so it might be in the OP's best interest when you give advice, to state how much game you do or don't have (and how often?). Just sayin'.

Also, the thought that women are people too, is just not practical here. I think we need advice from piccolo.

StevenVI
Member #562
July 2000
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If being yourself attracts the wrong type, maybe you should change who you are.

I used to have very long hair. All the girls I dated were freaks. I shaved it and have never looked back.

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Michael Jensen
Member #2,870
October 2002
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I used to have very long hair. All the girls I dated were freaks.

Note to self: grow hair longer.

Mark Oates
Member #1,146
March 2001
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;D

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LennyLen
Member #5,313
December 2004
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so it might be in the OP's best interest when you give advice, to state how much game you do or don't have (and how often?). Just sayin'.

Well, back when I was young and dumb enough to have competitions with flatmates about who could bring home the most girls, I managed 28 in just under six months. I did this by getting half-drunk and acting like an asshole, which goes to prove that this method does work.

However, I wouldn't want to share my life with any of them. In the 15 years since (and two or three years before), there's been approximately half a dozen, and they've been the ones that have mattered to me. Those were the women I got through generally being myself (I say generally, in that if I was to be entirely myself I wouldn't talk to any women since I have a phobia about it).

wearetheborg
Queen of the Universe
June 2003

OP: You are not ready for a serious relationship. It's as simple as that.

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scythe
Member #10,723
February 2009
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super attractive girls like guys who are jerks, because the majority of guys they attract are superficial, as is also, usually, the girl. it also adds drama to their life, without which they wouldn't be able to use facebook or tweeter. furthermore, this combination of "beauty and the jerk" creates the "hedgehog-dilemma-spring-oscillation" relationship that supplements their growing emotional problems. the world has come to admire and even envy such relationships through numerous publications found in your neighborhood grocery checkout stands and other assorted media.

:-/

LennyLen
Member #5,313
December 2004
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scythe said:

it also adds drama to their life, without which they wouldn't be able to use facebook or tweeter.

This behaviour has been going on for hundreds of years before social networking sites existed.

Quote:

the "hedgehog-dilemma-spring-oscillation" relationship

The what?

p.s. If you can type quote marks, your SHIFT key obviously works, so how about using it at the start of each sentence?



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