Participate in writing Limericks here.
Anyone can contribute. Most of the limericks are no good, but there are some very good ones. Especially if you follow the 'Naughty' link.
Two picks:
I once ate the head of a Bat It was then I tried fried rat It's good with spinach Yukey to finish, Was a helluva stench when I shat. Alone on the island were Peter and Dick They lay dreaming of shaggin' a chick When a canoe came ashore With an ugly old whore And they both took turns dipping their wick
]]>There once was a man named Blenis...
]]>Who went by the name of Dennis,
Talking of purile smut, there was a really funny bit on bbc radio 1 yesterday (you can get a podcast) where he phones people with silly names (usually Americans) and gets them to repeat them, yesterday he rang asking for 'a Randy Fanny'.
]]>When he went to town,
]]>The pope came around,
]]>And asked if he could swallow his penis.
]]>And you all should drink pastis
]]>Quick 'n dirty limerick by me:
There once was an old man from China, who thought that he never felt finer, he slipped on some rice, and thought that he dies he survived and got all rice for di(n)ner
The last line is not that good, but meh.
]]>Quick 'n dirty limerick by me:
I was expecting it to end with a different word that rhymes with China.
]]>I was expecting it to end with a different word that rhymes with China.
And which one? I don't get it ...
]]>And which one? I don't get it ..
Let's play "name that female body part"...
{"name":"AnatomyFemale.gif","src":"\/\/djungxnpq2nug.cloudfront.net\/image\/cache\/f\/f\/ff485cc5de4c716edb935a18586c73c6.gif","w":602,"h":792,"tn":"\/\/djungxnpq2nug.cloudfront.net\/image\/cache\/f\/f\/ff485cc5de4c716edb935a18586c73c6"}
There once was a lass from Japan
Who fell off the back of a tram.
Along came the conducter
Who jumped off and fucked her
And now she's pushing a pram.
There once was a lad from Calcutta
Who looked through a hole in the shutter.
All he could see
Was the fair maiden's knee
And the arse of the bloke who was up 'er.
]]>
Let's play "name that female body part"...
OMG, how could I be that stupid?? ?? 
You probably posted a picture, right? I didn't see it because I currently browse the web with pictures disabled, so I just see a black bar instead of the pic ...
]]>OMG, how could I be that stupid??
You browse without images. If you're not looking at pornography there's only like... four or five sites you must go on.
]]>You probably posted a picture, right?
Yes, an anatomical diagram.
]]>If you're not looking at pornography there's only like... four or five sites you must go on.
I know one! - it's called something like ... allegro.cc! 
Yes, an anatomical diagram.
I have free internet traffic since about 5 minutes and was able to look at the picture now, but thanks anyway for the description. 
Let's play "name that female body part"...
Those bones look painful.
]]>There was a young plumber from Leigh who was plumbing a girl by the sea. She said: "Stop your plumbing, there's somebody coming!" Said the plumber, still plumbing, "It's me!"
[edit]
Ok, that was old, but a good one.
Here's a brand new:
A guy on allegro.cc complained 'bout his eyes once to me. "I'm trying to be sharp but still I don't C#. That's why I prefer cpp."
]]>Nice, except you rhymed sharp with sharp. 
That's "be sharp" and "see sharp", a more seldom used way of rhyming.
]]>The C# limerick is good!
]]>Except that it's not dirty. Try instead to make a Limerick about coders who don't C# and probably have syphilis.
I don't C# 
if(y+x==3 && int(!mouse_b)) { alive = true; x += 2; return "allegro.cc"; }
]]>
It took me a while to get that. You have to sing it with rythm.
]]>The limerick packs laughs anatomical
Into space that is quite economical.
But the good ones I've seen
So seldom are clean -
And the clean ones so seldom are comical.
There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it.
While wiping his chin,
He said with a grin,
"If my ear were a _cunt, I could fu<k it."
I couldn't remember the 3rd line so i googled it... wikipedia really does have everything! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/There_once_was_a_man_from_Nantucket
]]>OK. Let's have another attempt at an a.cc group limerick. I'll start.
When Plato invented the plate.
AE.
]]>The other greeks couldn't think straight,
]]>I'll give it a shot:
Then the Spartans caught on,
]]>And found that their pants were gone
]]>I think "and found their pants gone" is how one should phrase that.
]]>Aristotle became quite irate
(no Eureka)
]]>[besserwissermode=1]
Quite good. And CGamesPlay are right. The rhythm is important.
The first line doesn't have to end up in a name of a place, but it usually should. But there's a rule that says that if lines 1, 2 and 5 end in a stressed syllable, lines 3 and 4 shouldn't. And vice versa. The former limerick in my first post follows this rule but the latter doesn't.
]]>There once was a man from Belgrave
Who kept a dead whore in a cave.
You might think that's sick
But don't judge so quick;
Just think of the money he'd save.
edit: Try these.
]]>And CGamesPlay are right.
Yay, I am plural
Sorry, CGamePlay.
]]>