@ Vanneto

Bohnensuppe --> beansoup I guess

Ein amerikaanse soldat ist stationiert in deutschland.
Ein Deutsche freund laded ihn ein fur ein ball, der kolonel ist auch da mit seiner Tochter.

Unterwegs nach dem ball, passt er nicht gut auf und sein freund sieht ihm weg fur ein lastkraftwagen "Mann hast du swein gehabt"
was sagst du fragt er ? "das du gluck gehad hast"..

Abends am ball kommt der kolonen zu die 2 freunden und fragt an der amerikaner " Und haben sie schon mit meiner tochter getanzt ?"

Der amerikaner ist bezaubert von das madchen und zagt " Nein das swein hab ich nog nicht gehabt"

Sorry, I meant thread not post.

What do you get if you combine water with a ballon? a water-ballon! \o/

I love doing things like that to people. The easiest one is yelling "Look! In the sky!" In a room with no windows. For some reason everyone still looks up...

I've been working for a while on translation of this joke to English, perhaps someone could help me. It's a electro engineer's joke. On Croatian language it goes like:
Hodaju kondenzator i zavojnica ulicom. Zavojnica se spotakne i padne. Kaze kondenzator: "Ha-ha, kako si smotana!". Zavojnica: "Šuti nabijem te!".

Mine partial translation/adaptation goes like:
A coil and a capacitor are walking down the street. The coil stumbles and falls to the ground. The capacitor says: "Ha-ha you're so clumsy!". The coil responds: "Stop it, or I'll press charges!"

On Croatian this is a double(-lame)-joke because clumsy and winded are homonyms, go figure.

Some functions were walking happily when one derivation joins them. All the functions ran away, except one. Which one? - e^x

If you're going to post an e^x joke, at least post a non-lame one.

A constant value and e^x were out walking when suddenly, across the street, they saw a member of the dreaded Derivative Gang lounging about.
"Let's not go that way!" the constant value said.
"Pah," replied e^x, "I'm not scared of him!"
"But if I run into him I'll become nothing!" the constant value shouted.
"Well, he can't do anything to me. Just watch this!" e^x said, and confidently walked across the street.
"Hello there," he said with a sneer, "You may have heard of me. I'm e^x. And... who might you be?"
"Hi," the gang member replied, "I'm d/dy."

"d/dx" is like a prefix operator that says "the rate of change of * with respect to x", or "at each value of x, the rate at which * changes as x increases", or "at each point on a graph of * against x, the gradient of the curve at position x".

For example, if y = 2x, then d/dx y (or dy/dx) = 2. The graph is a line with gradient 2.

If y = x^2, then dy/dx = 2x. If you draw a graph of y = x^2, you'll find that the gradient at each value of x works out to be 2x.

gnolam's constant value (y = k) will be a horizontal line on the graph, so the gradient at any value of x is 0 - hence the constant value becomes nothing.

e^x is an interesting function because d/dx e^x = e^x. The gradient at any point on the graph is equal to the height of that point on the graph. The derivative 'operator' doesn't do anything to it.

But, d/dy e^x is the rate at which e^x changes as y changes. Clearly, the value of e^x doesn't change as y changes, because it doesn't depend on y. The derivative has the same effect on e^x as it would on a constant value. Pwned.

Gangs are evil. I got attacked recently. -_-

Algebra won't cover it. It's calculus.

Ah Calculus. I should've guessed it was something like that. Give me a few years, then.

You aren't missing anything.

There was some formula I saw years ago that involved trancendental e, pi and a negative one that worked out to 1. I never figured that out either.

Googled "euler's identity" http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Euler's_identity
Now I can die content!