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Post your lame puns/jokes
Milan Mimica
Member #3,877
September 2003
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Well, that specific function wasn't there :P

Andrei Ellman
Member #3,434
April 2003

Ariesnl said:

Explanation..

In dutch to breed is "fokken" "ik fok" sound a lot like the engisch I F***
and pardon sounds a lot like paarden ( horses in dutch)

Nice ;D
I remember that joke being told ages ago, but instead of a Dutch farmer and a races lady, it had Ruud Lubbers and Bill Clinton IIRC.

Anyway, here in similar vein is one involving Hungarian. The explanation is that the Hungarian word for F*** is 'bus'.

A man runs to a bus-stop. Out of breath and panting, he asks soneone who looks like they've been waiting some time if the number 34 bus has arrived. "I've been here some time and not seen it" was the reply. "Phew" he says as he sits down "Thank god for that!". Along comes this woman who'se really good looking. She goes up to the man and says "You look like you've been excersising". "Not exactly excersising - just trying to get here on time". With a seductive look, she asks "How would you like some real excersize" and winks at him. With that, the two of them disapperar out of site. After a while, the man returns. The person who was there before he arrived said "You realise you've just missed your bus?" The man replies "So what, I just bussed the miss."

If anyone else has jokes involving trans-lingual puns, then please post them here.

Arthur Kalliokoski said:

Googled "euler's identity" http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Euler's_identity
Now I can die content!

Wikipedia - making people die content sice 2001.

AE.

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Bob Keane
Member #7,342
June 2006

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Slartibartfast
Member #8,789
June 2007
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Quote:

trans-lingual puns

This is a conversation that actually happened to me, the two languages involved are Hebrew and Arabic though :)

בזמן לימודים למבחן בערבית:
מה זה 'מה'?
מה?
מה זה 'מה'?
זה לא לא?
לא.

And a much less amusing explanation in English:
Me and a friend are studying for a test in Arabic, he asks me about the meaning of the arabic word "ma", which is pronounced exactly like the Hebrew word for "what".
"What is 'ma'?"
"What?"
"What is 'ma'?"
"Isn't it 'no'?"
"no."
Which is equivalent to:
"What is what?"
"What?"
"What is what?"
"Its no, no?"
"no."

Awesome, no?
(*awaits "no."*)

Andrei Ellman
Member #3,434
April 2003

Reminds me of this.

AE.

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Don't let the illegitimates turn you into carbon.

Milan Mimica
Member #3,877
September 2003
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Hm, doesn't remind me of anything.

Ron Ofir
Member #2,357
May 2002
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Quote:

בזמן לימודים למבחן בערבית:
מה זה 'מה'?
מה?
מה זה 'מה'?
זה לא לא?
לא.

:D We used to study Arabic on Fridays for 4 hours straight, other than a 15-30 minutes break in the middle. During this break we ate (usually Humus, though sometimes we were more original), practiced for tests, and played a really dumb game with a balloon, called "Nagachat נגחת". One day (more than one day really, but it sounds much better than "many days"), we studied conditionals. The main example we used was:
איד'א דרסת נג'חת )If you study, you succeed)
At some point, as a battle cry for our game (or maybe just a really bad joke), we changed it into:
איד'א נגחת נג'חת
And the story ends with an A4 paper hanging on my wall, which has a smiling balloon on it and the wonderful phrase.

Neil Black
Member #7,867
October 2006
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Quote:

איד'א נגחת נג'חת

And what does this mean? By the way, how do you find translations with Google? Are there certain sites you need to Google for?

Andrei Ellman
Member #3,434
April 2003

Possumdude0 said:

I love doing things like that to people. The easiest one is yelling "Look! In the sky!" In a room with no windows. For some reason everyone still looks up...

Have you tried the "Don't jump" prank. If you're with a group of friends and you see someone on a balcony, keep shouting "Don't jump!" at them. See if you attract a crowd of people. It would be interesting if someone tried that in Bourbon Street in New Orleans.

AE.

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Don't let the illegitimates turn you into carbon.

Neil Black
Member #7,867
October 2006
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I wished you'd mentioned that a couple of months ago. It was the perfect opportunity. My friend was just about to go off to the army, and was feeling bad because he knew it was going to suck. And he was standing on a balcony. It would've been perfect.

Ah well, I'm sure I'll have another chance.

Andrei Ellman
Member #3,434
April 2003

It's more fun when you try it on an unsuspecting stranger.

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Don't let the illegitimates turn you into carbon.

Johan Halmén
Member #1,550
September 2001

Hm, what about if you walk along a sidewalk with yuour friends, then you suddenly shout "Don't jump!" and point at a spot just in front of their feet. They will jump sideways. And you will say "Suckers!" and earn their eternal admiration.

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Neil Black
Member #7,867
October 2006
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When I want to freak out my friends I usually just jump on them suddenly. Scares them every time, even when they're looking right at me.

Ron Ofir
Member #2,357
May 2002
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Quote:

And what does this mean?

It doesn't really mean anything, it was just stupid pun. I'll write it in English:
Iza darasta najahta (If you study, you succeed) -> Iza nagachta najahta (If you butt, you succeed). The meaning of the name of the game "Nagachat" in Hebrew is butting/raming with your head.

Quote:

By the way, how do you find translations with Google? Are there certain sites you need to Google for?

Babylon should work, I guess (though it won't work on the sentences I wrote, since they weren't in Hebrew, I just wrote them in Hebrew letters because I couldn't be bothered to write in Arabic). Other than that, here's an Arabic-English-Arabic dictionary, and here's one for Hebrew.

Andrei Ellman
Member #3,434
April 2003

Here's one that does all kinds of languages and has links to many other language-resources:
http://www.faganfinder.com/translate/

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Don't let the illegitimates turn you into carbon.

Northburns
Member #8,821
July 2007
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A joke my high school physics teacher spread around:
Q: "How many microphones fit in one megaphone?"
A: "10^12."



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