As I'm sure everybody remembers, I play music and record dumb songs which I give away for free on the Internet. (I'm too lazy to look for the thread I posted six years ago to reference.)

Allegro.cc has a "request a review" feature for the games on the depot. Not that I've used it, so I don't know how it works ... but there is no such thing that I know of at the moment for music on the Internet.

This is where the challenge comes in: I would like to receive feedback on my music which I have posted on archive.org. I have received over 1000 downloads but only have one review. I would like to see what other people's honest opinions on my music are. Be brutal!

Drone EP is ... weird, would be my description.
Isaac Jacobs 3 has songs mostly with lyrics and electric guitars.
The Abrahams Unplugged is all acoustic guitar songs, with only a few having lyrics.

So ... what do you all think? (You can see all my albums here.)

I don't take it seriously when someone says that.
But I'm honest anyway, so I'll take it as "don't sugar coat it" and "I won't mind metaphors referring to discolored wooden desks".

So... I have some time before I go to sleep, so here are just a few words on each song:

Drone EP
Plastic fo' breakfast had decent music, but the "vocals" were pretty annoying, they remind me a bit of Worker Bees (Billy Talent), but in a bad way.
You took my LSD is pretty... lame. It sounds more like Marijuana than LSD. (In that stereotypically LSD is connected with amazing visions (like Lucy in the sky with diamonds) and Marijuana with being stoned and lazy.)
The 10 minute long crazy song... Is actually really nice. With a more professional feel and execution (better timing for example) and maybe a different set of instruments (or use the current ones for a more "normal" sound.), it could be really good. The part where all the instruments come together could particularly benefit from a better timing and harmony between the instruments. It sounds a bit too much like random banging (well, I guess you can't really bang on string instruments, but you get my point.). The "vocals" suck, get rid of them please.
Shades of Red... Starts out really discordant (had to use a dictionary for this one ), and then just makes me want to sleep.
At best with a whole lot of work and professional help you could use some samples of it to make music for one of those clips on National Geographic that always make me sleepy. (The kind where there's some guy surfboarding with music in the background, or maybe birds flying, or whatever.)
Melanchoir could have been really nice if it wasn't for that whole "on drugs" theme. So again, the instruments need to be timed to fit each other and not intentionally assault my ears with a cheese grater.
You took my LSD II -> See "you took my LSD". Did not like. Did not even bother listening to all the way.

The Abrahams Unplugged
Major. Meh, could be the intro theme for some spacey game.
Angus is a bit underwhelming. Performed better it sounds like it could be the "second hand" accompanying some more interesting piece of music. Except for the livelier part towards the end, which seems out of place.
I'm still a retard on a Guitar - I like it, nice theme to it, decent lyrics and vocals (if you can call them that.). There are a few places where the vocals are a bit bad, but they are actually mostly nice. The first time the music stops and then restarts with a new theme is worse then the other parts of the song. Luckily it ends quickly when the music "restarts".

And now I'm going to sleep. I'll probably continue where I stopped tomorrow. Unless you ask me not to

OK, but don't take it personally...

You make it sound like you do that by choice. You don't.

The few songs that I listened to were terrible. I don't understand how Slartibartfast managed to listen to so many of them... The quality is pathetic... It sounds like you used a cheap microphone to pick up the guitar and vocals at your computer... It's one thing to do it. It's another thing to release it sounding like you did it.

Judging by the titles of the songs I assume you were going for a Weird Al sort of thing, but it's not working. If you're serious about your music start taking it serious. If you're not then stop wasting bandwidth and disk space.

I don't know what it is you're trying to do, but stop it. Honestly. Gangsta Folk? That's disrespectful to actual gangster rap artists. I honestly consider it racist. What I heard almost sounded like you were trying for country, but you missed by a long shot.

The lyrics were terrible. If you're going to have lyrics it's important for them to be clever. It takes time to come up with clever lyrics. Don't rush it.

Also, you seemed to make mistakes playing the guitar and weren't very confident when you tried to sing (seemingly missing your cue to sing). That should NEVER happen on a released recording! Re-record until you get it right. If you never get it right...there's your sign.

Sorry, what was the challenge again?

OK, I need to learn and then go to sleep, but if its a challenge, I will take it on!

So, whatever The Abrahams Unplugged is ( an Album, perhaps? ) I went to listen to some songs from it. Here is what I think:

Major

What the fuck? From what I heard, its like do-re-mi-fa-so-la-ti-do-ti-la-so-fa-mi-re-do in a loop. Really repetitive. And the quality isn't the best either. In short, its something you expect in a film showing a insane guy going... Well, insane. It hurts the mind.

Angus

Still, I hear some repetition, and I think some mistakes when playing. But other than that, this is quite an enjoyable song compared to Major. Nothing special, but its enjoyable.

I'm Still a Retard on a Guitar (WTF?)

OK, the guitar playing is quite nice. I mean, it WAS quite nice until it came to the singing part. Oh my god. Did you make the microphone yourself? The recording quality is shitty. And your voice... Well, its not that good. But I reckon you can fix that with some good editing with some good equipment. ( Heck, look what Paris Hilton did. ).

A Toast to Toast (Man That Stuff's Good)

This one is like Angus, a little better even. Enjoyable. All tough I must say that its gets annoying after a minute or so. I think its because the constant repeating sounds and the constant guitariness. I need drums!

Stop the War (Save the Whales)

The beginning was very good I must say. But the problem in your songs is that they are too long compared to how much different sounds are played. The repetitiveness really ruins everything for me. Sure, there is a hint of a more squikier guitar later on and the humming voice. But thats all. More diversity! Please!

Watermelon Song

Well, this one was good, one problem though, sometimes you "scratch" on the guitar. Its not a pleasant sound and it doesn't happen that often. But it can really discourage people from listening to the whole song.

Porn Groove No. 12

This was a groovy song. I have said it once and I will say it again. Repetition is not good. Yes, there are some parts where another guitar gets played. But not enough. Mostly there is only one guitar playing the same tune over and over and over again. Sure, thats how most successful songs have, but they have other instruments and singers to mask that repetition.

Thats it for today, I will listen on tomorrow and add to this list.

Also,...
[quote ]You can see all my albums here...
</quote>
...I wouldn't call those "albums"... Just because you have 10 or 12 "songs" doesn't mean you can bundle them together and call them an album... Perhaps it would be more appropriate to call them demos...
[quote ]I have said it once and I will say it again. Repetition is not good.
</quote>
Not necessarily. Rap, for example, uses a lot of repetition and sounds great doing it. The music itself isn't the focus in rap -- the lyrics are -- so it works well in that genre. Whatever it is that the OP's genre is it requires clever lyrics and enjoyable music, neither of which I heard at any time in his music... Sorry.

I just want to say that I agree with everything that has been said about the vocals.

Yes, it is just a major scale. And I dislike that track and skip over it when I listen to that album. I also skip over the songs with lyrics on that album. I think they're all terrible.

Who is forcing me to make my junk available? I'm not understanding your statement.

I guess when I said "be brutal" I meant to be honest, not retarded. If you consider anyone who calls themselves a "gangsta" or "gangster" to be worthy of respect in the first place, then... Further, from the definition of racism, I do not see where you make your conclusion.

Edit: bamccaig, please get a dictionary >_<

Fixed.

Now you sound like making your music available is doing somebody a favor. I think in any creative process the process benefits from being honest about it's quality and desirability (or lack thereof).

If that's how you feel then why the fuck would you associate your music with the term? Why shouldn't I respect somebody calling themselves a gangster? Some people really are gangsters. Some of them are very deserving of respect. Others, like you it seems, use the term in vain.

If you can't handle the truth you shouldn't ask for it. I don't mean to discourage you from writing music. Just make sure it's good before making it public... I don't particular enjoy being this brutal with you because I have written a few lyrics and I know that it hurts when people step on your effort...

You wouldn't.

First of all "gangster rap" isn't a race, so it's not racist. And, I fail to see how that's disrespectful at all.

I can't find any rap that sounds close to good, let alone great.

Did you listen to his music? It obviously doesn't fit into anything related to gangsters so then why use the term to describe the music?

A lot of songs have irrelevant titles. So what?

Buy a decent microphone and re-record all your songs again.

IIRC, it was used to describe the genre.

Genre is a pointless classification. Does Rock music have anything to do with rocks?

There are a million "sub-genres" out there. My music fits into none, so I created my own. I apologize for invoking anyone's white-guilt, though.

The music isn't meant to be taken seriously, it's not supposed to be Top 40 stuff. I don't listen to Top 40 music. I don't want to hear Top 40 music. (Cue someone saying "then don't expect us to listen to it," but that was the challenge. I didn't expect you (collectively) to like it. It's far too non-mainstream. )

The Drone EP was recorded with a computer microphone.

Wow, I didn't even notice that. I agree, it is annoying. I guess my mind automatically blocks it out. Next time I do acoustic stuff I'll have to try to edit those out.

Trust me, I'm well aware that my stuff isn't enjoyable to others. I find honest criticism to be enjoyable, but not baseless nitpicking and nonsense.

Genre names (at least real ones) are usually derived from something related to the music or culture. They're not just mindless nonsense thought up by an uncreative person.

Rock and roll#Origins of the phrase.

Your songs are not songs. They are just improvisations of badly performed chords and some basic scales(also badly performed). Obviously you don't have any skill or talent when it comes to music(performance or music writing), IMHO you suck at both.

I don't enjoy your music and probably you don't enjoy it either. Everything in your music is poorly done, it sounds like a bad karaoke session recorded with a cheap cell phone.

Please, don't take it personally, it's just my humble but honest opinion about your music.

<quote name="The Song "Alice's Restaurant"">

This song is called Alice's Restaurant, and it's about Alice, and the
restaurant, but Alice's Restaurant is not the name of the restaurant,
that's just the name of the song, and that's why I called the song Alice's
Restaurant.
</quote>