http://www.examiner.com/article/another-couple-found-guilty-of-murder-for-parenting-by-to-train-up-a-child

http://whynottrainachild.com/2010/04/20/quotes-from-ttuac/

So yea... let's talk about parenting.

EDIT:

This is some demented crap.

My brother and I were spanked as children. I consider that acceptable discipline. I distinctly remember when I was about 8 years old my mother had just spanked us for talking and generally making noise instead of going to bed. Being in a goofy state of mind I began laughing as she walked away and she called me on it. I don't remember what she said, but my reply was, "<arrogant laugh>, that didn't hurt."

Her response was something along the lines of, "Do you want me to send your father up here?!"

"NOOOOOOOO!!!!11"

Which I think is a lot better than a 3 year old telling his mother to, "fuck off," in Walmart, and her threatening, "You're going to get a time-out!", but that's just me. I've seen time-out in practice (by a child-care professional) and it does not work.

Of course, there's a line between discipline and abuse. If the parent is angry they need to regain their composure first. You can't discipline when you're angry, just like you can't drive angry. In any case, I think that the old adage, "this hurts me more than it hurts you," is probably a good measure of whether you're abusing or disciplining your child. Of course, I'm not a parent, and as the child gets older (especially boys) they will likely be able to take more so it's hard to say whether it needs to hurt them more or not. I suppose the punishment should equal the crime.

I have spanked my nephew once or twice (with my brother's encouragement). He was only 1 1/2 and from his reaction (and his father's) I never got through the diaper. It seems like his parents have since lost the stomach for it though because now they just futilely yell at him (like idiot dog owners that think the individual should understand them when he clearly doesn't), which I think is a shame. In general, I don't consider them the sharpest tools in the shed, but I respect their right as parents. They started out smart... I suspect that the mother (who probably was never spanked herself) is the cause for the sudden change.

In any case, I don't know that I want that responsibility. Especially in this feminized society. I would hope that there is training available for parents that are uncomfortable with spanking for discipline, but in this feminized society we live in there probably isn't... It is practically taboo. Fuuuuck. Which I guess sets the stage up perfectly for freak shows like the OP.

The parents of the OP should be made an example of. I don't care how short their school bus was.

When the consequences for your actions are a minute of boredom you can get away with a lot. You underestimate how big of an asshole a 5 year old boy can be. They're not dumb, and they're not all that harmless. I've seen it first hand. They do not respond to threats of time-out. It's basically not a punishment. You threaten them with time-out and they will blatantly act-out in front of you. Basically, "so what, go ahead!" If they've been spanked before and you threaten to spank them it's, "NOOOOOOOOO, PLEASE, SORRY, SORRY, SORRY!"

This reminds me of when we used to get left with babysitters for a couple of hours before my mom got off of work. Oh the lulz. Locking them out of the house, trying to get away with anything we could. We were boys. They were predominantly teenage girls. They had no hope of controlling us.

Making your child sit in a corner for two hours seems like child abuse to me.

When they get old, they will think that all conflicts are resolved by stealing the other person's iGadget and pointing to a corner. Do you want to raise your child to be a thief?

I really don't get how you think. Doesn't make sense to me.

That seems like a contradiction to me. It seems clear that it made you control your behavior somewhat. You had to take special care to not get caught (and if you were anything like me you failed several times in your attempts). I think that in itself teaches you several crucial things about life. If you're even capable of doing things that you aren't supposed to (and obviously it is possible, though there is a limit to what extent) then the punishment is irrelevant because you don't receive it. You know that if you are caught you will receive a punishment that you definitely don't want. That is a significant improvement over a punishment that doesn't even phase you. We got away with a bunch of stuff that our parents didn't know about. Some of it we told them now that we're grown. It's usually a crap shoot between laughter and disgust. I think they're pretty satisfied with their efforts though. Not perfect, but who is? Perhaps a little bit of "getting away with it" is even necessary. I think it's pretty natural.

Append:

I suppose I should note that there is a difference between parents/guardians disciplining you compared with teachers/strangers. For one thing, I imagine it would be hard for a teacher to be "professional" (for lack of a better word) about it. Kids and adolescents can be extremely frustrating. I don't think that it's really their responsibility to deal that discipline. At the same time, I think it's a shame that 99% of parents don't seem to do their job (at least, these days... I imagine it wasn't as bad 20, 30, or 40 years ago...)... Also, even if you do agree with what the teachers did, it would have a negligible effect if the parents/guardians at home didn't follow through.

A parent who hits their child simply does so because they know of no better alternative. Its the easy way out.

I don't find it acceptable. Ever. Not in any form. You are hitting a defenseless child who puts his entire trust in you. He trusts you to tell/show him what he is doing wrong. You can do that the right way or the spank way.

Some parents are such nitwits that they punish their child for behavior they created... Just makes me go red with rage.

As for that link, the above I think for normal "spanking", what is stated there is monstrous.

Abusing children (physically or psychologically) is never acceptable and will only serve to frighten it, it will never teach it values or respect. Thankfully, all forms of violence against children are illegal in Sweden.

That book is truly disgusting, and the fact that it's for sale on sites like amazon makes me lose hope in humanity. But of course it's the parents fault in the end - no book can force you to abuse your children (though that and a good dose of religious zeal will help).

Here's a petition aimed at Amazon regarding this (and other similar books) btw; http://www.change.org/petitions/amazon-refuse-to-carry-books-which-advocate-the-physical-abuse-of-children

I'm sure it's not a solution, or if it will even do anything, but I signed it anyway (it's quite literally the least one can do).

Oh boy that really makes me mad.

Wanting your children to be tough is one thing, but doesnt the person themselves have to achieve it with their own power? You can't force someone to be strong.

"blanket training, where 6month old is hit when they try to crawl off a blanket on the floor" how is that meant to make a child tough? That make them weak and submissive and obedient (aka degenerate).

Oh man so angry right now.

Beating your child is not at all the easy way out, not in the long run.
It's short sighted and very high maintenance to keep that up, and it's no fun unless you're a sadist.

Being kind and reasoning with your child is fun for both parent and child and the lessons are learnt quicker.

There's the opposite side, too.

http://youngcons.com/radical-parenting-advice-from-matt-walsh-hold-you-kids-responsible-for-their-behavior/

I don't think that's the opposite side of anything that's been talked about in this thread

What that page talks about is pretty sane and level headed. I mean OMG consequences?

My dad did have the heart to do it. He had these heavy leather belts. Folded them up a couple times and went to town. I don't think he did it hard enough to give us a long term bruise, but it sure hurt like hell.

I was scared of him for quite a while.

There's more than just that that could have caused resentment. But to be honest, I don't remember a lot of my early childhood. So I suppose that's a good thing?

I dunno, as I grew up, I realized a lot of things about him, and why he did the things he did. Doesn't make it any better, but I don't hate him or anything.

Actually, what I hate the most, is how he gave up near the end. Mix between diabetes and heart problems, and he just totally gives up on his diet. Ugh.

Though, I suppose if I wanted to dwell on things, I could drum up a lot of anxst and resentment. But it doesn't do me any good to do that. I used to, a lot. All that ever did was further ruin my life.