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| Post your lame puns/jokes |
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TeamTerradactyl
Member #7,733
September 2006
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If bicycling gets old after a while, is that a Cyclic Redundancy Error? Would you Sucker-Punch a vacuum? If you're tired of hearing Spanish people tell you Yes, are you Si-sick? You can't hear anything on the other side of the mirror. It's just silent reflection... What's the fastest bar of soap? Speed Dial! What kind of messages do rock climbers leave for each other? Cliff notes! You got C++? So if I got B-, I'm smarter than you? |
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Kibiz0r
Member #6,203
September 2005
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What blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint. What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and drives a tractor? Grass. I lied about the tractor. --- |
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Matthew Leverton
Supreme Loser
January 1999
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Quote: What's brown and sticky? A stick.
That's what I was going to contribute. |
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Billybob
Member #3,136
January 2003
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What's tired and sticky? Your mom. _________________________________________________ |
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Joel Pettersson
Member #4,187
January 2004
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What did the sourcecode say to the CVS repository? I am not afraid of commitment! |
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Rampage
Member #3,035
December 2002
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http://www.punoftheday.com/ said: “The surgeon really did not know how to perform quick surgeries on insects, but he did one on the fly.”
-R |
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Peter Hull
Member #1,136
March 2001
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What do you get if you cross a pig with a chicken? Mod pig mod chicken sine theta. Why are there no aspirins in the jungle? Because the parrots eat 'em all. What's green, got six legs and if it lands on your back, can kill you? A snooker table. Pete |
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Slartibartfast
Member #8,789
June 2007
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Quote: What do you get if you cross a pig with a chicken? Mod pig mod chicken sine theta.
Surely you mean what do you get when you cross an elephant with a banana? Further edit: They go up to 8, though now I can't say they are all great. Several of them definitely fit this thread though ---- |
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Jakub Wasilewski
Member #3,653
June 2003
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Quote: What's green, got six legs and if it lands on your back, can kill you? A snooker table.
Can? These things weigh over a ton you know --------------------------- |
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Bob Keane
Member #7,342
June 2006
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No punch line, just something to consider: Would you want to be caught dead with a necrophiliac? By reading this sig, I, the reader, agree to render my soul to Bob Keane. I, the reader, understand this is a legally binding contract and freely render my soul. |
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Slartibartfast
Member #8,789
June 2007
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<Boxthor> They call me Hadoken 'cause I'm down-right fierce. (bash.org) ---- |
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Andrei Ellman
Member #3,434
April 2003
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Why was the Space-Shuttle Challenger sponsored by Coca Cola? Because they couldn't get Seven-Up. AE. -- |
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Bruce Perry
Member #270
April 2000
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Given the type variable declaration <K extends Comparable<K>, V extends Comparable<V>>, what is the most specific common supertype of K and V (written lub(K,V))? ? extends Comparable<? extends Comparable<? extends Comparable<? extends Comparable<? extends Comparable<... Oh wait, that's not funny. -- |
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Neil Black
Member #7,867
October 2006
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That also doesn't make much sense to me. I sure it's my ignorance at fault here. I don't remember where I heard this... probably somewhere here, since this is one of two sites I regularly visit, but here goes: Why did the chicken cross the Mobius Strip? To get to the same side! I am Mildly Annoying Man! |
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Kibiz0r
Member #6,203
September 2005
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Quote: Why did the chicken cross the Mobius Strip? To get to the same side! That's actually pretty funny. In 2d, a mobius strip appears to have one side. --- |
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MiquelFire
Member #3,110
January 2003
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"Jimmy cracks corn and I don't care. Jimmy cracks corn and I don't care. Jimmy cracks corn and I don't care. So why am I singing his song!" You know, the Never Ending Story sure ended quickly. Compared to The Land Before Time. --- |
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HardTranceFan
Member #7,317
June 2006
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Here are some lame contributions: Nothing succeeds like a budgie. Life is like a shit sandwich - the more dough you have, the less shit you have to eat. Save our beaches - harpoon a fat chick. Don't drink water - fish crap in it. -- |
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Kibiz0r
Member #6,203
September 2005
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(This actually happened a couple days ago) Antiques Roadshow: Even though this is mostly machined, there is also a lot of hand-tooling on the piece. Me: I do a lot of hand-tooling on my piece. --- |
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ixilom
Member #7,167
April 2006
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10 blondes doing quantum physics. ___________________________________________ |
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TeamTerradactyl
Member #7,733
September 2006
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Whales are mammals. Mammals have hair. Shave the whales! You got C++? So if I got B-, I'm smarter than you? |
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Onewing
Member #6,152
August 2005
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In the style of xkcd. http://www.allegro.cc/files/attachment/592889 ------------ |
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X-G
Member #856
December 2000
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A group of Polish people got on a plane to New York. For some reason, they all ended up getting seating on the left side of the aisle, and spent their trip talking about this and that. As they approached New York, the pilot announced that they were now passing over Liberty Island and that if people looked out of the right side windows they could see the Statue of Liberty. Our Polish people rushed to look, and as they did so the plane immediately plummeted and crashed into the ocean. Why? ... too many Poles in the right half-plane. -- |
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Kibiz0r
Member #6,203
September 2005
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X-G: I don't think I get it... This one requires some preparation. You have to get people telling a lot of racist jokes, and it helps if everyone's a little drunk. "What do you call a black man flying a plane?" --- |
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CGamesPlay
Member #2,559
July 2002
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No, you call him a pilot -- Ryan Patterson - <http://cgamesplay.com/> |
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Vanneto
Member #8,643
May 2007
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The I do a lot of hand-tooling on my piece made me fall from my chair! Anyways: Teacher: "John, do you know why airplanes have propelers?" Yeah, I translated it. Not as funny in english I think! -- |
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